Things Im not looking forward to about going back to church:

I havent minded the lack of church. I love the you tube mesages in the comfort of my own home. What I do miss is the corporate worship and alter calls for physical people to confide in and have them lay hands on you and pray. Plus of course having someone teach my kids new worship songs. Thats the good stuff.

What I dont miss are the judements I would make.. feeling like others were having a fashion show and watching weekly group selfies like church is a club.. comments about how smokin hot people looked.. really? is that the goal? Church is about people in need of a savior.. the world around us is a mess... we know the truth and need to be lights in the darkness right? set apart, not acting just like the world... These were adults..! We need to model for our kids not to run after empty goals but to care about the more important things.

No matter our story, we are all people forgiven and undeserving.. we should all be on an even playing feild.. as brothers and sisters. Christians should be down to earth, generous to the poor, not wasting money on hair dos, jewelry and style.. but putting others above ourselves... we are supposed to want to die to self right..? (of course im not there yet, or even close!)

Instead i had a leader from my church recently seem interested in my beeswax wraps at a potluck (before covid) only to laugh to a friend immediately after saying "look at her hat, she probably knitted it herself too".

it made me feel like a joke to her.

in my defense: i'm not a hippie, i care about the environment which I think all believers should.. Im just trying to be responsible to do my part to lower waste in my home... I also save money at the same time.. certainly not extreme. Beeswax wraps arent cheap and my hat was purchased as well... We are told to care for creation which makes me care about the environment and consider the little things i do to impact it.

i guess we are judging each other in opposite ways. thinking someone is cheap vs thinking people are wasting money on things i think are unecessary.

Last night I went to a moms group reunion bon fire and the host was wearing dirty clothes. it was so refreshing! Real people.. not full of pride putting on a show for anyone, just being herself. I felt so comfortable to be myself too.

Thats what church should be like.. no one judged or rejected for being different.. no one trying to impress others. no one passing our star or dot stickers like the "You are special" story. no thanks. Thats not Gods plan for any of us.

i try not to judge either but it sure can be hard sometimes..

We are all imperfect people created by and loved by God. how do you deal with Christians who arent just real imperfect people... accepting their imperfections? or ones that outright think they are better than you? Thats the not so good stuff...